Dear diary,I was sleepy. Very tired but somehow something just seem to ache me. It may seems small to you, it may seems nothin to you but to me it isnt. Like I have always warn myself, put my guards up but still I ended up back to where I used to be, back to square 1. So now I knew. I have always mean nothin to you. You dont need me, you have so many others around you. Me missin in ur life doesnt inflict anythin on you. If you could be so insensitive, so heartless towards my feelings, my needs then why should I waste my time botherin about you, carin for you? Seein me weep and cry doesnt even aggrieved you a bit, sometimes it makes me wonder if I really do matter to you, at all.Just what you do and say today hurt me a lot. Damn lot. It may seems little but the little resentments accumulated has seem to get bigger. Maybe its really THE TIME I should really take my leave. Whats the point of holdin on to somethin, harbouring hopes when it just wont work no matter how much we try? Please leave me alone. Really. I have make up my mind. Like I said, call me when you are sober. Really sober. Imagine you were me, you will know how I feel. Thanks Lan for listenin to me, you may not know anythign, we may not talk about anything thru out the whole call but somehow cryin it out makes me feel better. A lot better. Still, the pain could be felt.
Somehow I really wish you could be more apprecaitive of me. Somehow I just wish you knew that cryin works better for me. Not to show the weak side of me. Somehow I just wish you knew.
